The will to keep living....

From lost loved ones to everyday life now everything i do i'm forced to think twice. I breeze through each day knowing lifes a bitch and i aspire to go to continue school in hopes of becoming rich. I've seen my homies dropping like flies and their killers wasting no time taking their lives. A vague emtyness fills my heart knowing me and my father are forever apart. But yet the day he died i didn't cry. So why do i even exist? is the question I ponder does God really exist?? i wonder. The lord answers my question everyday with multiple blessins. As long as i praise he will continue to raise me up in the face of adversity but only if i continue to grow closer to him personally. So i know i'm not wasting all the energy i'm giving because the Lord continues to bless me with the will to keep living.......